"How to Tell a True War Story"

How do you generalize?

War is hell, but that’s not the half of it, because war is also mystery and terror and

adventure and courage and discovery and holiness and pity and despair and longing and love.

War is nasty; war is fun. War is thrilling; war is drudgery. War makes you a man; war makes you

dead.

The truths are contradictory. It can be argued, for instance, that war is grotesque. But in

truth war is also beauty. For all its horror, you can’t help but gape at the awful majesty of combat.

You stare out at tracer rounds unwinding through the dark like brilliant red ribbons. You crouch

in ambush as a cool, impassive moon rises over the nighttime paddies. You admire the fluid

symmetries of troops on the move, the harmonies of sound and shape and proportion, the great

sheets of metal-fire streaming down from a gunship, the illumination rounds, the white

phosphorous, the purply black glow of napalm, the rocket’s red glare. It’s not pretty, exactly. It’s

astonishing. It fills the eye. It commands you. You hate it, yes, but your eyes do not. Like a killer

forest fire, like cancer under a microscope, any battle or bombing raid or artillery barrage has the

aesthetic purity of absolute moral indifference—a powerful, implacable beauty—and a true war

story will tell the truth about this, though the truth is ugly.

To generalize about war is like generalizing about peace. Almost everything is true.

Almost nothing is true. At its core, perhaps, war is just another name for death, and yet any

soldier will tell you, if he tells the truth, that proximity to death brings with it a corresponding

proximity to life. After a fire fight, there is always the immense pleasure of aliveness. The trees

are alive. The grass, the soil—everything. All around you things are purely living, and you

among them, and the aliveness makes you tremble. You feel an intense, out-of-the-skin

awareness of your living self—your truest self, the human being you want to be and then become

by the force of wanting it. In the midst of evil you want to be a good man. You want decency.

You want justice and courtesy and human concord, things you never knew you wanted. There is a

kind of largeness to it; a kind of godliness. Though it’s odd, you’re never more alive than when

you’re almost dead. You recognize what’s valuable. Freshly, as if for the first time, you love

what’s best in yourself and in the world, all that might be lost. At the hour of dusk you sit at your

foxhole and look out on a wide river turning pinkish red, and at the mountains beyond, and

although in the morning you must cross the river and go into the mountains and do terrible things

and maybe die, even so, you find yourself studying the fine colors on the river, you feel wonder

and awe at the setting of the sun, and you are filled with a hard, aching love for how the world

could be and always should be, but now is not.

Think about this, I just wrote an essay about contrast in this piece for English Class - you cannot appreciate light without darkness, nor love without solitude.  

P.S.

Mom, Dad, and Serena thank you so very much for all the birthday gifts!  I received the final two packages today, the one with the DVD and the clothes, granola, and so many other random things :)  I especially appreciated the lilacs from outside my window, I can imagine them in bloom, and their scent accompanies many beautiful memories at home.  

Palm Sunday

                Arms outstretched, the wind at my back, standing on the edge of the outcropping, the sunset sinking in glowing splendor, as the moon rises over the opposite horizon, shining silvery white in the midnight black sky, only the brightest stars barely visible, yet there hangs Orion’s belt.  The lights of Mostar begin to flicker on, and streets are outlined by the pinpricks of light.  The school stands like a stripped fortress in the middle, Susac’s blue roof off on black hill, the futbal stadium, the park, the old bank, the train station off on the other side, and the turquoise Neretva flowing beneath the bridges.  This is Mostar, this is my home.

                I walked to the cross with Mirwais this evening, quite spontaneously, which made it even more of an adventure.  As soon as I arrived home from MUN he yelled out the window, “Hilary we’re going to the cross” and I couldn’t argue with that.  We spend so much time looking up at the cross each day, yet the moments are rare to reverse the situation and stare down at the city.  Each time I try to memorize the winding river, the buildings, and communist bloc apartment buildings, and the streets as they intersect networking across the town. 

                The feeling as we walked up there, and then stood gazing out at the city in the foreground and the mountains surrounding the basin, the smell of the wind and the occasional faint aroma of flowers, combined reminded me of so many places and times throughout life.  It was as if all my wonderful memories like this, a combination of walking, wind, and sunset were compounded upon each other and the smiles on our faces could not go away.

          Flinging my arms wide, the wind almost swept me off my feet, and I couldn't help but sing praise.

Songs of the Night:

Shaked’s playing “Hey Juliet” right now J

Fireflies

I’m Yours – Jason Mraz

Wonderwall – Oasis

Sweet Home Alabama

(the last three performed by Schirin, Misha, and Dino with the school band at Coco Loco)

                After walking down in the dark, talking the whole way of course, we went to Coco Loco where the school band was performing.  The music was wonderful, the trio Schirin (Austria) Misha (Russia) and Dino (BiH) performed an amazing selection of music, and everybody was singing along, clapping, dancing, all of us swaying with our arms wrapped around each other.  Smiling faces of many friends, Shaked, Anita, Dorontine, Verena, Simone, Mirwais, Nicolai, Anja, Masha, Yuli, Dani and so many others.  It was the best party, quality fun, and a wonderful atmosphere.  Encore!       

               

                This morning the final general assembly debates, resolution voting, and closing ceremony for the MostMUN conference occurred.  MUN is an abbreviate for Model United Nations, an international program that simulates United Nation delegate meetings.  Since Friday, over sixty students from UWCiM and schools throughout BiH, Turkey, and the UK, have been debating resolutions within four separate councils as representatives of countries from all over the world.  I was in the Historical Council (not actually existent in the UN) as a representative of the Russian Federation and the USSR (depending on the date.)  We discussed two situations and created several  interesting resolutions:

                Insitutionalized Racism in South Africa under the system of Apartheid

                The Situation in Bosnia and Herzegovina 1993 

As well as in the other councils:

                Security Council

                                Piracy Off of Somalia’s Coast

                                Regulations on a Nuclear Free World  and the creation of  Nuclear Free Zone in the US

                Environmental Council

                                Protection of the Global Climate for Present and Future Generations

                                Global Plan to Solve the Issue of Water Shortages

                Human Rights Council

                                Combating Defamation of Religion

                                Promotion and Protection of Freedom of Speech in China                

On Friday evening our school hosted the annual traditional Global Vision contest.  Here in Europe there is a competition similar to American Idol called Euro Vision – where delegates, one from each European country, compete for the title of the best singer throughout Europe.  Our school modified the concept a bit, to include candidates from all around the world.

Representing the country of Austria I performed a medley from the Sound of Music with Leah, Isa Belle, Shaked, Schirin, Rikka, Laura, Michelle, and Ardi.  We had a lot of fun putting together the choreography, and singing along to all the classic songs – “Rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens, A few of my favorite things, Yodel-le-yodel-loo, I am 16 going on 17, Do-Ray-Mi, the hills are alive with the sound of music, and finally So long farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, good night.”  I was the part of Gretel (of course) and it was really fun.  Some other acts included Amitai, Selmir, and Miran representing Sweden who won, Clement singing “My African Queen”, Mirwais, Nicolai, and Niv doing a medley of music ending with “Don’t Worry Be Happy” and wishing all of us first years good luck with the upcoming months of hard work doing IAs, EEs, and ToK.  To translate from IB language – IAs are Internal Assessments, EEs are Extended Essays, and ToK is theory of Knowledge presentations and essays.  Whoo sounds like a lot of fun right? J

These next few months are going to be filled with a lot of hard work, many decisions and opportunities are riding on the results of my predicted grades and the quickly approaching exams and SATs.  But I’m ready, work hard, play hard.  I just need to hone my focus, but still enjoy balance and all the friends and new family that I am lucky to have here.  One of Shaked’s crazy metaphors really applies: when hiking on a trail it is necessary to look down quite a bit so that you don’t trip, and so that you follow the right path, but it is also good to look towards the horizon, towards your goal, because the mountain is waiting looming ahead.  And if your shoe gets untied, or life throws you a challenge, stop and take the time to tie it, so it doesn’t trip you up in the future.

Now, we have two more days of school, then Shaked and I are leaving for Easter Break!  It’s a SURPRISE!  And we are incredibly excited!

And, maybe something semi-important to add, I turned 18 years old last Wednesday, the 24^th of March, 2010.  I am a legal adult – wow.  But that is a whole other blog entry.  For my birthday I collected advice from everybody for the next years of my life, and it resulted in some interesting and pleasant results.

A shout out to all those Portlanders finishing up their Spring Breaks and heading back to school, I send my love to you!

Good Night!          

Balkan Sunflowers - The End of the Week

     Wow, it has been an amazing and full week, with a little flavor of life here in Kosovo, lots of children and laughter, pounding nails, eating delicious, food, cooking, communicating (or trying to) in five or more different languages, learning a lot about the work being done here, and learning more about myself.  I would say that I feel privileged to work with Andy, Dorontine, Amer, and Dani from UWCiM, Martin, a student teacher from Germany, and all the people at Fushekosovo.  We were especially honored my Mohamet and his family by hosting us, accepting us into their home, feeding us, and allowing us to work alongside them in the center.
     This evening was a wonderful way to wrap up the week - our team took the initiative to cook dinner for our family, after a long days work.  Martin bought some ingredients - but we were not quite sure how everything would turn out.  The menu was spiced baked chicken a la Andy (with some guidance), pasta salad (American and German style) prepared by Martin, Amer, and myself, appetizers by Dorontine and I, and chocolate chip cookies by your very own.  There were thirteen people total, all crowded around two small tables on couches and stools.  It was cozy and nice, and Dorontine and I dominated the kitchen and took responsibility for all the cleaning - since they haven't allowed us to do anything all week out of pure hospitality.  I'm really proud.
     Before we returned home the staff at the center hosted a party for us with some snacks, drinks, nice music and taught us one traditional group dance.  They are all very sweet people, and I enjoyed working with them this week - even though the language barrier restricted some communication smiles, translations, and simply working together is its own language.  After the party everybody came to inaugurate the shed that we built (which is basically finished).

Now we will sleep, in the morning Amer's father will come to pick us up and drive us back to Rozaje, from where we will take a cab back to Sarajevo then catch the evening train back home to Mostar, retracing our path from last Sunday.  I'll write more and post just a few of the many photos later!  Safe journeys to everybody returning to Mostar!

Balkan Sunflowers

   Each year at all the UWC schools students participate in project weeks, where we are given a week off of school to arrange a project doing social service, investigating historical events, analyzing economic situations, doing sports activities, discovering cultures, and many other creative ideas.
    This year I chose to go to the new country of Kosovo to work in a school as part of a program named  Balkan Sunflowers.  The learning center that we will be working at is located just outside of the capital Prishtina.  Our group is seven members strong including Andy Hemphill (USA), Benedikt Gottwald (Deutschland), Dorontine Berishaj and Amer Bralic (Montenegro), Dani Ramajo Falcon (Spain) and our mentor Martin from Germany.
   This grassroots organization was first created in 1999 during the Kosovar war to aid refugees and Roma people.  There are two major projects, the Learning Centers Network and Great Films that Change Our World.  Their three primary areas of focus are the community, human dignity, and children and youth.
     While we are there we will be living with host families and working at a learning center during the day.  We will be leading workshops for the kids at the learning center between the ages of 5 to 18.  We organized science demonstrations, musical workshops, environmental education, artwork, geography, sports, and other ways of interacting with the kids.  Also, during the day we will help to cook and serve hot meals for the children, and we will be working on several building projects for the school.
    Some other students from our school are doing amazing trips as well - a group of people left last night for Istanbul to research religious minorities, two groups are going to Wien (Vienna) to research Balkan immigrants there, and to experience the culture.  There are also people going to Slovenia, Belgrade, Croatia and Sarajevo.  I'm really proud of all the student initiative that made these projects into reality.    

Pruture Day

Edelweiss

I had a lovely evening today.  First, we had the Balkan Cultural dinner, which was a great array of presentations and delicious food.  The students were representing Kosovo, Macedonia, Montenegro, Serbia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, and Croatia.  We had a very talented folk singer sing some local songs, watched a traditional dance, and of course ate delicious food.  With a stomach satisfied with baklava, and many deserts and meat dishes.  Shaked and I made our way back to Musala after a short stop in Old Man's Cafe and Coco Loco.  It was a long day, we woke up early to greet two exchange students who arrived from UWC Adriatic this morning by bus.  Allie from Canada, and Emilian from Poland are switching spots with two of our students, Ardi from Kosovo and Kristina from BiH for a week.  During the afternoon I worked planning culture week events, making videos, and a moderator meeting about Pruture (Present Future) Day on the stage.

When Shaked and I finally arrived back in Musala we curled up with a bunch of lovely ladies and watched The Sound of Music.  It was the perfect movie to cheer us up, and make us smile.  Thank you to Leah, Isabelle, Michelle, Laura, Schirin, Shaked, Rikka, and Verena for the nice time together.

I dedicate the song "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" to Shaked, because she won't be sixteen for much longer, and I am turning 18 soon!  And of course my two favorite songs are...well, I really do love all of them, but "My Favorite Things" and "Edelweiss".

Edelweiss, Edelweiss
Every morning you greet me
Small and white, clean and bright
You look happy to meet me

Blossom of snow may you bloom and grow
Bloom and grow forever

Edelweiss, Edelweiss Bless my homeland forever.


Climb ev'ry mountain
Search high and low
Follow ev'ry by-way
Every path you know

Climb ev'ry mountain
Ford ev'ry stream
Follow ev'ry rainbow
'Till you find your dream

A dream that will need
All the love you can give
Everyday of your life
For as long as you live


I have some really soothing memories of my Dad playing this song on the guitar in the living room mixed in with John Denver some evenings as I was falling asleep.  Those nights I would definitely fall asleep with a smile on my face.

Good Night to all of you around the world.  May you remember your favorite things in the good times and bad, and cherish all that you have around you.

Diva Grabavica

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breath out.  The wind roaring and rushing through the mountains, and rustling the leaves on the ground, the barren trees leave the slopes exposed.  It is a beautiful and quiet place, the only human noises come from the tramping of five pairs of boots, the breathing from our mouths as we zig-zag up the trail, and I can feel my heartbeat pounding in my temples and my chest.

First signs of spring!

Fears

I was on a website called stumble, and this is what randomly showed up:

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1wMufs/www.phobiaguide.com/

There are a lot of fears in the world, each of us are afraid of different things, but the key is to acknowledge your fears, and overcome them.  By doing so we become greater people, and we can live our lives to the fullest - without being controlled by fear.

I have quoted Eleanor Roosevelt many times, "Do one thing that scares you every day."
What do you fear?  Why do you fear?  How will you overcome your fear?

Ahhhhhhh, Sigh of Happiness and a Beautiful Sunshine Day :)

     First, I write to you from a wonderful place, simple, yet wonderful.  I am lying on my stomach on a wooden stage in the middle of Spanish Square right next to my huge orange and yellow striped school.  It is a glowing sunny day, after about a week of dreary clouds and rain.  I can feel the warmth of the sun soaking into the left side of my face, and the coolness of the shadow in my right.  A barely noticeable breeze is flowing, everything is a live, people are laughing, talking, moving, and resting and enjoying this beautiful day, the 25th of February.
     I just finished TOK lessons for the day, and the whole class was sitting or laying in a circle, as we talked about the comparisons between art and life.  ToK is Theory of Knowledge, and a part of every IB course - it brings together all of our subjects, and demands that you critically analyze your assumptions - and validate your opinions.  For me, it embodies the yearning that I have now to think about my beliefs, my assumptions, things that I previously assumed were common knowledge and thoughtfully examine them, and change them when I find it necessary.
     The first quote was, "Life is a work of art."  And then we moved on to asing who is the artist, do we start with a blank canvas or do we utilize  things we are given to create the outwork ourselves.  Everywhere around this place we can see people "living" = going about their every day lives.  Do they think about the idea that their lives could be art.  We cherish and revere art in so many ways - some types of art are sacred, others are provocative.  Which is your life?  Do we treat life like art?  What is the purpose of art?  What is the purpose of life?  A friend told me a couple days ago that I always ask ten questions when I am asked one.  Most of the people close to me know that I love questions - but more so I love answers, because they open up a whole new understanding, and a whole new set of questions.

   The beginning of spring has always been a memorable and special time for me, it is the beginning of lacrosse, of the last push before summer.  It is a new beginning, but it is also a summing up of all the hard work during the winter.  It is a time to dream, and fulfill those dreams.  Ahh, I am a dreamer, a romanticist, but a person who I hope is known to make those dreams come true, for myself, and also for others.
     This city is beautiful and broken at the same time, divided, yet united against the juxtaposition of the landscape.  I'm staring at a ruined building, only the chimneys and craggy scraps of wall left standing above a pile of rubble, but behind the pieces in the distance stand the mountains, capped with snow, some in the shadow but the tops glistening in the purity of the whiteness.  It is beautiful, I love the mountains - I love the outdoors, the full breath of pure air brings me peace.  Now, it is time for English class, we are analyzing poetry at the moment.
    I hope that you enjoy a few of my musings - and I send my love to you all!

Skiing at Jahorina

February 8th 2010

Yawn, stretch, clock says five am, jump out of bed, wake up Beni, Andy walks in the door, Nicolai is finished packing, put in my contacts, sling my pack on my back, run to the car through the drenching rain, and we're off.

Andy Hemphill (my second year from the US), Benedikt Gottwald (my a fellow firsty from Munich, Germany) Nicolai Svanefjord (a second year from Denmark) and I (Hilary Johnson from the US) all went downhill skiing at the previous Olympic ski area outside of Sarajevo.  It was awesome day, as we cut up the power covered slopes.

Even though I have been skiing since I could practically walk, this was some of the best snow.  We found some virgin slopes on the east side of the mountain - and that drenching rain back in Mostar was a fresh layer of powder snow eleven centimeters thick up here at the mountain.

Andy and Benedikt are boarders (snow-boarders) and Nico and I skied.  We spend the whole day together, crossing over the mountain.  It was a great group because we were all pretty much equally matched skill-wise, nothing was unconquerable ;)

There were a couple of wipe-outs, a couple of yard sales, races, wicked jumps.  At the top of the mountain it was completely enclosed in fog, and from the lift the ground and the sky were indistinguishable - but as soon as we dropped 100 meters the visibility was great.

Taking a day to enjoy life was perfect, and a calm before the storm of this past week!  Spending time with the guys was amazing, I really enjoy the laughs and good times that we have together.  My favorites this trip were the conversations on the lifts, swooshing down the mountain, a delicious lunch (Nico has great taste for food) and cake! and enjoying a relaxing evening afterwards cooking pesto tortellini and watching Dr. House.

I hope that this will be a tradition and that Beni and I can go again next year!

A Walk with Leah

                Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “Do one thing that scares you each day.”  Emily Pellegrini was the person who passed on this piece of wisdom to me, and though I do not seek out situations that scare me, they seem to come unexpectedly.  Emily, I have always remembered this ever since you told it to me freshman year.  It has provided many conquests, adventures, and memories – this is one of them.

                As we stared into the twilight at the ruins, I felt transported to the ancient land of Narnia at the castle of Cair Paravel when Lucy, Susan, Edmond, and Peter returned to find their happy reign as Kings and Queens long gone and grass growing among their turrets.  The gray stones cut long ago into rectangular bricks, now with rounded corners built the fragmented walls, which once surrounded this ancient monastery.   

The Orthodox Serbian monastery, which used to stand up the hill from the Old Bridge, was destroyed during the war, because of hatred towards the Serbs.  The area within the perimeter is mostly cleared so that the new construction of a Russian style church can be built, but the walls and piles of rubble and stones from the old building encircle the area, almost the size of a smaller soccer field.

The only parts of the monastery, which remain, are two huge square pillars, which held up the entryway, and formed the passage from the world into the hallowed passages and places of prayer.  Now they stand holding up the entire vastness of the night sky, the countless number of stars, pinpoints of light in the encompassing blackness.

After school today, I came to Musala and invited Leah to go on a walk in the crisp air as the sky was darkening towards dusky blue, and the mountains were rimmed with pale pink and yellow.  She has been working hard, like many second years, as they go through exams and turn in their final college applications and financial aid.  Still at the beginning of second semester I am beginning to feel the urge, slight oppressiveness, but enthusiastic anticipation of the work that needs to be done in the next twelve months, then I too will be almost finished, just reviewing all the concepts and knowledge (what is knowledge Mr. Regan would ask) that I am learning now.  We walked along Musala Street, then onto the cobblestones of old town, our feet directing us towards the Bridge.

At first we were talking about how this semester will progress, it seems like so much time on one hand, but on the other, it will pass by lightning.  She said that when she was a first year she could not imagine UWCiM without her second years, and I agree the friendships and relationships that I have with my second years.  Especially Leah, Nicolai, Srdjan, Isabelle, Mirwais, and Andy are wonderful; I really treasure them, the memories that we have and are making, and the impact that they have on my life.  Though next Leah offered encouragement and told me that this has been even more amazing than last year, even though I cannot imagine it right now.  She told me about a journal entry she wrote last year when they found out they would have three first year girls, she said that she really wanted a girl who she could bond with and be close to, that she would be able to support all of us, and that somebody would come who was a Christian as well as fun-loving.  Then, she said that I was the answer to that request.  I feel very honored, and I am so glad that she is my friend, my sister, my second year, a wonderful hug, a good laugh, and so many other things.  When we just got back from our walk Yuly looked at us dressed up warmly in hats and scarves and laughed and said, “You guys are such sisters,” and then broke out into an Israeli song about sisters.

While standing on the old bridge Leah told me about one of the teachers last year, who told them to deeply explore the extent of their metaphors.  It made me think about the river as life, and how it is always flowing, sometimes fast, sometimes slow, each at the right time.  Right now I think that I am in a phase of more contemplation and thoughtfulness.  Leah reminded me of something that I said to her near the beginning, I said that during the summer I am really social and enjoy being around a lot of people, and although that does not drastically change in the winter, subconsciously I tend to enjoy my quiet times, steaming cups of tea, and time with the people who are closest to my heart.  Even without knowing it, that is the pattern that I am in right now.  She reminded me of the saying, “water under the bridge.”

From the old bridge we wandered towards the bookstore, but it was closed, so for a moment we stopped and looked out over the crooked river and the small bridge.  And then headed back the way that we originally came, but turned up some back alley stairs instead of continuing towards Musala.  At the top of the stairs across a narrow road we continued to head up another set of derelict stairs and crossed the largest road through Mostar.  On the other side stood a gated off road that rose fairly steeply upwards and curved.  The sign in front showed an Ornate Orthodox Church, and from our knowledge of local Leah and I gathered that it was in the process of being built on the site of the old monastery.  There was a hole under the fence, we looked at it, looked at each other, and decided to go for it.

We walked up the road, and the night became darker as we left the light of the road, it was a transition between two different parts of this world, the modernized system of transport and communication, and an antique symbol of religion, reverence, and respect.  We sat and watched the lights of Mostar, listened to the ringing of the bells from the church, silence and darkness enveloping us in a sense of peace as my mind raced with thoughts, which slowly resided.  Moments of complete quiet and peace are rare and I treasure them greatly.

                Enjoy the small moments in life, allow time for spontaneity to happen, if you have to do something find something good about it, being cheerful is an outlook on life.

February 2^nd, 2010

                

Late Night Tickle Fights

Random funny moment :)  Last night my whole room was up relatively late studying for math tests today, as well as physics and getting ready for the week.  In the middle of the night we started a huge roomie tickle / pillow fight.  It was hilarious!  I was laughing for such a long time!  But we were really worried that Sejla, our house mom, would wake up and come down and bust us :/

Look for the little amazing moments in life, sometimes they are the best!

Robotics

The last four hours, I have been building a robot.  And I can still hear drills buzzing, people shouting directions, and hammers pounding from the other room.  In front of me sit the motors and gear boxes that I just build.  The frame is being shaped and put together as I write.

Ingrid, a fellow American student from Michigan, started a FIRST robotic team at our school in December, before break.  When we returned building, designing, and programming started in full.

http://www.usfirst.org/

This is an awesome project because we are learning how to work together, how to use technical and programming skills, and five people will have the opportunity to travel to Israel for the actual competition.

The students working on this project are from UWCiM, the gymnasium, and a local technical school.  Local students are all working together with us internationals to make this dream a reality - and a cool one at that.

The final robot will be about three feet by three feet, and controlled remotely through programming and a human controller.  The challenge this year is like a soccer game, and robots work together on teams to see who can score the most points during the 2 minute 15 second playing time.

I am really enjoying the opportunity to physically build something with my hands, so often in school we write papers, talk about concepts and ideas, but don't create anything physically.  I find a lot of personal satisfaction from building things, putting together motors, and trying to figure out how a robot can kick a soccer ball.

For project week, which is coming up in early March, I hope to find a project to make something physical as well, or make a concrete difference instead of superficially investigating something.  An ultimate project would be similar to the work that I did in La Purisima Mexico two summers ago - building houses, soccer fields, or community development.  If you have any ideas or opportunities you are more than welcome to pass them along!

That's all for now folks!  

Suplemental Blog

I'm not going to switch blogs, but I started a new blog to post pictures etc on, because wordpress offers more options for posting.
The web address is

 http://hilaryjohnson.wordpress.com

Enjoy the photos from the winter weather we have been experiencing recently!
I will post the link, whenever I post on it so you still only have to check this primary one :)

Ingredients

Ingredients in a documentary film produced in Portland, which explores the impact of eating quality foods grown with care locally verses mass production which is detrimental to the health of our society, physically, and they would argue economically.


Here is a short exerpt: 

The local food movement takes root.

American food is in a state of crisis. Health, food costs and our environment are all in jeopardy. A movement to put good food back on the table is emerging. What began 30 years ago with chefs demanding better flavor, has inspired consumers to
seek relationships with nearby farmers.

This is local food.  


http://www.ingredientsfilm.com/


Take it into consideration :)

Where I've Come From

"For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City."
- Chris Tomlin


Mostar is always changing, fluctuating, and shivering with development.
Each day my eyes blink with surprise at the unexpected things which happen here.


This morning, I sat up at six o'clock in the morning and looked out to see snow blowing sideways,
and swirling everywhere, like a crazy tarantella.  As I gaze out now, the first footprints have already been completely covered.  I will be making my own path soon.


When I arrived home late last night, I found a book lying open on my bed with a note from Leah, "Something to reflect on this evening."

The Road Not Taken

  Robert Frost

1874-1963

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bend in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that, the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

The road on which we travel makes all the difference.  Coming to Mostar, to UWCiM, is the road less traveled by, but it is making all the difference in my own life.  

There are two primary ways, it has opened countless new horizons and opportunities to explore and pursue and by challenging me academically, personally, spiritually, creatively, and through time management, and stepping up for leadership I have grown, and become more of myself.  Right now I am in the middle of this journey, and the growth is intensely centered, but I am at peace within the craziness of life here, and wake up enthusiastic for each new day.  

I am very privileged to be here, and I would like to thank the people who ultimately make it possible: my parents.  Mom and Dad, thank you so much.  I want to let the whole world know how much you mean to me as the human beings whom I hold closest.  Without your support emotionally and financially I could not be doing all the incredible things that I am doing here.  I hope to make both of you proud.  I love you. 

Word of the Day

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consociationalism

Consocialtionalism

Shaked and I finalized the plans for our Educational Reform Conference today.  We are finishing up the schedule and writing the invitation letter.  Then we just had a really interesting conversation about Palestine.

Contact Note

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hilarygo24@msn.com

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Cheers!

Time Zones

Sitting in this airport dealing with so many time zones it confusing here it goes.

Right now it is 4:49 AM in Washington DC
                     10:49 AM in Mostar, Bosnia
                     11:49 AM in Egypt (Fiona)
                      1:49  AM in Portland

Right now my body is telling me it is almost 11 AM, but it is way earlier here in DC and even earlier in Portland, I might be a bit discombobulated for awhile.  And my watch, computer and cellphone are all on different times....
Plus I'm calculating times for Chicago, Qatar, and Mumbai...could it get even crazier? :)

Adventures in an International Airport

Hey Everybody!

I'm sitting here stranded having an adventure in the Washington D.C. airport in the middle of a huge winter snowstorm.  :)  If I wanted snow for Christmas I sure got plenty of it! 

Dane is lying in front of me on one of the baggage carousels asleep, and she is such a cute shminkus.  We spent a great night with a wonderful family in Sarajevo - classic Bosnian hospitality, with kava and caj.  Then in the morning they drove us to the airport, first the Dutchies for their early flight, and then Dane and I at seven to catch our connecting flight from Sarajevo to Vienna.  The airport in Sarajevo was operating, but we were nervous flights would be canceled due to the snow there as well as the fog, but we made it into the air and on our way to Austria safely and on time.  Thank goodness!  It was beautiful seeing all the mountains from above with snow covered peaks.

   I started reading my first book of the trip, "The Bridge Over the Dhrina" and after living in BiH it gives a very interesting, more ancient, historical perspective to the conflicts and divisions within the Balkans.  The author  Ivo Andrić won a nobel prize in literature for this book.  Just in case you wanted to know ;)  Anyways, it was a 10 hour flight from Vienna to Washington D.C. and it went well until we got to the Eastern seaboard where it is currently a raging snowstorm, which is dumping maybe a foot or two of fresh powder snow all over the city.  I sat next to a really interesting guy who is building the new US embassy in Sarajevo.  He told me lots of stories of his travels around the world first with the navy, and now as a private government contractor.  Besides a lot of experience traveling all over the world, he told me a lot about the fraud and waste involved in government projects that are not properly managed.  This starts a complete conversation about governments, corruption, and then of course the next question - how can we solve it?  The same principles apply to any project, if it is well organized and managed a project is more bound to be successful than one that is thrown together, especially if each person knows what they should do, and what is expected of them.  This applys to UWCs, to NGOs, to governments, to everything.  One lesson that I am debating in my head is what Barbara told me right before I left for Kosova, "Don't be a candle that burns at both ends."  What is the tipping point between excelling and doing a lot of things and doing too much!  It is easy to want to do more than is possible at UWCiM because there is so much potential and passion.  

    Back on topic, we were barely able to land in D.C. because the snow was falling thickly and the wind was blowing quite hard.  The scrapers and trucks and workers couldn't keep the runways clean and the planes de-iced.  I found out later that our flight was actually not supposed to leave from Vienna, but I am glad that it did - even though I am not home to Portland, I am at least back in the US and across the Atlantic Ocean.  We landed, but weren't able to escape the plane for an hour, and when we finally did we had to wait for our baggage for an hour to an hour and a half.  Well, when we finally got that we had a mini celebration, then went to brave the news about our flights to Oregon and Michigan.  Turns out all the flights for the rest of the night were canceled and the airport was officially closed but all the people who are stranded are allowed to spend the night here.  It is quite a nice environment, everybody is really friendly.

    I got REALLY lucky!  I have a guardian angel, because I went to reschedule my flight for as soon as possible, and originally the guy said unfortunately the soonest he could get me a flight would be on Wednesday the 23rd.  I was close to losing hope, but he kept on looking and I was praying and crossing my fingers and he really wanted to help me get a flight sooner.  Thank goodness he kept looking, because he somehow found me the last ticket for a flight to San Francisco at 6:45 Sunday (this) morning and then FINALLY a flight to Portland at 10 AM (but you need to take into account the time difference.)  So since about 7 this evening I've been hanging out in the airport.  Everybody is really friendly here, because we all a common bond - we're all trapped here trying to get planes to where we need to go.  There are lots of international travelers trying to get to foreign countries.  Right now its just a little past midnight, and I am sitting with a group of students studying at universities in the US, but originally from Qatar, and I also had a conversation with several guys from Mumbai who are trying to get home to the sunshine.  A girl named Zainab  And several young guys in the navy who don't have very much experience.  Ratatoui is playing on a laptop.  Christmas jazz music is playing in the background.

    So many questions are running through my mind right now, as I go through this transition back home I'm really reflecting on the past five months.  I'm noticing many differences between the US and Bosnia, and Europe.  Things that I wasn't even conscience of before.  I need to think about this a little more and then I will add it :) 

   Now I need to sleep myself on the carousal, pray that I can leave in the morning as well as Dane!

Love,

Hilary  

I woke up this morning in Kosovo and it was snowing!

Good Morning Everybody!

I'm in Kosovo right now for a two day Social Issues conference directed by the American School in Kosovo.  The school is located in the capital city Prishtina - and this morning we woke up and a blanket of snow covered all the rooftops and the ground and flakes are still gently swirling down :)
     It is beautiful, and reminds me of all the Christmas feelings :)  To everybody back in Portland, I hope that you are also enjoying your winter storm that blew in!  I hope that it doesn't last a week, because in exactly a week from today I AM COMING HOME!  At the beginning of the year Christmas seemed like an eternity and it literally feels like the time has passed in only a few days.  Although I do not want to leave Mostar, and all the amazing new friends and family that I have there - I am really looking forward to coming home.  Because there is no place like home for the holidays.
    The conference here is very interesting.  Students from all over the Balkan region are doing research presentations on social issues in their region.  Shaked and I did a project together titled, "Educational Reforms in Post-Conflict Bosnia and Herzegovina."  We had a successful presentation yesterday, even though there were minor technical difficulties with power stopping several times.  The educational system in BiH is a central topic of discussion, especially at UWCiM because it is very segregated and georaphically separated between the three ethnic groups (Bosniaks, Croats, and Serbs).
   While in the conference,  I realized that these presentations are great - but what really needs to be done is to take the suggestions each of these students make to improve the situation AND PUT THEM INTO PRACTIC.  Students are not too young to make a difference.  So, even though plans are still in the pre-infant stage I want to organize a youth conference with students from all ethnicities to come together and discuss how the education system can be reformed.  Hopefully we could cooperate with the OSCE, and there would be presentations, debates, and most of all lots of discussion - finally concluding with some sort of unified statement about what students think about Educational Reforms.
    I also learned a lot about the history and current affairs here in Kosovo.  This state only gained independence from Serbia in April of 2008, but Serbia and several other countries still do not recognize its indepdence.  The US has played a huge role here over the years, first when President Wilson created Albania and then secondly, and more recently when President Clinton saved Kosovo in 1999.  Because of this people here I can truly say are obsessed with the US.  They have a street named Bill Clinton street.  They have statues of US presidents.  American flags fly from flag poles.  And students dream of studing in the US.  The majority of people speak English and people know the current affairs and history of the US really well.  The capital city Prishtina is an interesting mixture - trying to be "American" but it is also very undeveloped and run down in many ways.  Kosovo is one of the poorest countries in Europe.  But there is a sense of optimism running through the people here.  Even though currently there are many trials, economically and political corruption, they still have a lot of hope for a better future.  Now we are going on a tour of Prishtina to see the historical sights, like the Newborn sign, and Bill Clinton street and then off to another day of Presentations.
   I am here with Shaked my roomy from Israel, Isabelle my good friend from Holland, Ana Filipovic from BiH, Marko from BiH, and two teachers Mr. Raymond Lewis (Economics teacher from Wales) and Dzenan (pronounced Jennan) the history teacher from BiH.
   Last remark, Happy 17th Birthday Fiona!  I wish you all the best, Hilary motto - dream big, and then turn those dreams into reality :)

Yours Always,

Hilary

The First Day of December

December 1^st, 2009

First off, I cannot believe how quickly the days, weeks, and months are flying by.  Even the days seem to zoom past in a second, but when I look back it seems like much more time has passed than actually has because each day is jam packed with work, school, friends, amazing conversations, projects, dreams, goals, and most of all Adventures.

                This past week has been especially adventurous, because first I was in northern Bosnia and Serbia with Milica and Shaked, as I said before and now I am finishing my third day in the Open European Debate competition.  I didn’t believe that I could say this, but each day here is even longer than days back at school, because there are no breaks.  Most of the day we are either debating or preparing for the debate, and during the mornings and evenings we are still thinking about the motions.

                Each morning I am waking up at six o’clock to arrive at school by seven, because that is when classes for my host sister Oana start.  I attended German classes this morning, and ironically they were debating in class – about whether to extend the school day, because classes end a little after noon. 

Each morning there have been organized activities for the debaters to do, as well as prepare for the two upcoming debates in the afternoon.  This morning was a lot of fun for me, because a group of ten or so people were invited to go to a local bakery and learn how to make and bake pretzels.  So, we watched the bakers operate all the fancy equipment that mix and cut the dough into equal pieces, and then we rolled and twisted the balls of dough into pretzels!  Then we coated them with butter and salt crystals with another machine, and loaded them into the huge ovens to bake for only 12 minutes before they popped out hot, delicious, and golden brown.  Yummy!

Yesterday morning, we attended the famous Christmas market in the center of Stuttgart.  It is a beautiful place because the huge square in the center of the city is filled with booths selling gifts, ornaments, food, and a large fresh vegetable market with all sorts of oddities.  I felt my Christmas spirit begin to glow, and to my dear family and friends in Portland, I cannot wait to decorate the Christmas tree with you, bake cookies, make gingerbread houses, spend time with family, go adventuring, spend time relaxing with friends, eat our traditional seafood Christmas dinner, and find a special way to show my loved ones that I care.  In Mostar, the Christmas spirit isn’t as evident because half of the population of Mostar is Islamic and they do not celebrate Christmas.  But, still it is around the corner, there is a lot to happen in the next twenty days before I finally arrive home.  And I am focusing on living in the moment, because I really do cherish each moment because I am so thankful and always curious about something new.

Then the rest of the day, until eight o’cock tonight was consumed with debating, first preparation for the debates, and then the actual debating.  The two motions for today were:

THBT = This house believes that….

THBT…ferocious animals should not be kept as domestic pets.  (Opposition)

THBT…profit-making dominates healthcare.  (Proposition)          

The great news is that all three of us, Ingrid, Marius, and I learned from our mistakes yesterday, and really improved our speeches for today.  And we won BOTH debates!

Once again, tomorrow we have two more debates, the first one is an impromptu debate, so we receive the motion one hour before to prepare, and the second motion is THBT people are too quick to applaud Obama.  So tonight I need to collect all the information together and write the outline of the debate.

Basic format, for each team there are three speakers, each speech is eight minutes, and then the 4^th speech is a reply speech of only four minutes.  My forte is the third speech because it provides the majority of the rebuttal – and I get to be fiery and passionate and prove that opposition points are completely wrong.  Dad, I completely attribute my great debate skills to you.  Our debates throughout my life made me prepared for even the hardest most experienced opponents.  You would do very well, of this I have no doubt.

This evening, after returning home I ate a delicious Romanian meal prepared by my house mom.  Then with Oana’s German speaking skills we called my distant relative Dieter (my Grandpa’s 1^st cousin?) who lives in Stuttgart, to say hello and see if he wanted to meet.  It worked out very well, and he is planning to come to my host families home tomorrow evening after I am done debating!  I really hope that it goes well, I’m very excited to meet him.  Also, I hope to get in contact with my Grandmother’s best childhood friend, who also lives here.

So, big day for tomorrow – I need a little bit of rest J

Good Night and the updates will continue.

Yours,

Hilary Anna